Transcript: Episode Ten – The Poltergeist (Part Two)

The word transcript in blocky marker style script, over a background of greenish turquoise brick.

The Way We Haunt Now

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Episode Ten – The Poltergeist (Part Two)

CW: This one goes out to my ghosts, ghouls, goblins, and folks who go bump in the night who might need a little warning that this episode contains animal sounds [3:57-5:40]. Timestamps in the transcript. 


SFX: Ghost hunters chanting in the background. Paper flutters.

FRANKIE: What’s this? 

SFX: Paper crinkles.

FRANKIE: (Reading) Tenancy agreement.

APARTMENT: (whispers, bouncing and refracting) sign

SFX: Signing sound.

FRANKIE: There. It’s done.

SFX: Across the house, the front door bursts open. Mary, Josie, and Eulalie shout Frankie’s name. Poltergeist sounds intensify.

SFX: Theme music (simple guitar with spectral oohs and ohs and occasional cymbal crashes) fades in…

COURTNEY: (V.O.) The Way We Haunt Now, Episode Nine: The Poltergeist (Part Two)

SFX: Theme music fades out. More intense poltergeist sounds fade in., ghost hunters chanting in background throughout…

MARY: (shouting above roar) We need to get out of here. We’re too late. She’s already bonded.

EULALIE: (shouting above roar) I’m not leaving. Not yet.

LOTA: (shouting above roar) But you promised your sister. And your friend. Believe me, we all want to help Frankie. But it’s not safe right now.

EULALIE: (shouting above roar) Frankie, I need you to hear me. You put me in the hospital, but I’m the one who dragged you back out into the world. It’s my fault this happened to you, and I’m going to figure out how to make it right. I’m going to––

SFX: Poltergeist roar somehow intensifies.

APARTMENT (whispers, bouncing and refracting with Frankie’s voice added): Get. Out.

JOSIE: (shouting above roar) We need to leave. 

EULALIE: (shouting above roar) She doesn’t mean it. And besides, this is my apartment. I’m not going anywhere.

MARY: (shouting above roar) One of you go get the humans, will you? We’re going to have to drag this woman out of here for her own good. I’ll stay and try to make sure the walls don’t swallow her.


SFX: Poltergeist roar fades back in… 

MYRTLE: (shouting above roar) I don’t think this is working.

CAS: (shouting above roar) That’s because you’re breaking our focus.

DANNY: (shouting above roar) No, Myrtle’s right. Something went wrong.

NICK: (shouting above roar) Says the woman with no more experience in this than the rest of us.

MYRTLE: (shouting above roar) That’s not true… her grandfather…

DANNY: (shouting above roar) My granddad was killed by a poltergeist. I got revenge. I’m the only one in this room with previous exorcism experience.

ALICIA: (shouting above roar) I wouldn’t be so sure about that if I were you, little sister.

DANNY: (shouting above roar) Alicia? What are you doing here? How’d you find me? No. You know what? I don’t care. You need to leave. I’m working.

ALICIA: (shouting above roar) I can see that. But you’re the ones who need to leave. You don’t have permission to be here.

CAS: (shouting above roar) Danny, what the fuck is going on? Did you tell her we were going to be here?

DANNY: (shouting above roar) What? No. I haven’t spoken to her since… 

NICK: (shouting above roar) Uhhh… guys?

CAS: (shouting above roar) Not now, Nick. 

MYRTLE: (shouting above roar) No, seriously, I think you need to see this. It’s the ghost. From earlier.

SFX: Theme music (simple guitar with spectral oohs and ohs and occasional cymbal crashes) fades in…

SFX: Roaring as poltergeist sounds intensify…

ALICIA: (shouting above roar) Frankie? Is that you? I’m here with your friends.

APARTMENT (whispers, bouncing and refracting with Frankie’s voice added): Get. Out.

SFX: Roaring, glass breaking… Myrtle screams.


SFX: Poltergeist roar fades into rain…

PARKER: I voiced my objections.

SFX: Swings baseball bat and destroys a mic.

PARKER: I got myself on the front line.

SFX: Swings baseball bat and destroys another mic.

PARKER: So why does it still feel like I’ve been ignored and sidelined?

SFX: Swings baseball bat and destroys a mic. Wraith raccoon chirping in agreement.

PARKER: You, too, little buddy? (sighs) Who knows. Maybe if we wait long enough the action will come to us.

SFX: Eulalie’s screen door bursts open and the ghost hunters run out, panting…  

PARKER: (To Elmer) What the heck? Ghost hunters?! 


PARKER: This is my sister’s property, and I’d advise you to get off it before I use this bat on you.

CAS: We were already doing that.

NICK: Cross our hearts.

MYRTLE: I told them that we should try reasoning with the poltergeist, but NO they just had to jump straight to exorcising it and they pissed it off.


DANNY: No, something else went wrong. It was working. It should’ve worked. 

CAS: Either way. Now there’s a malevolent spirit intent on destroying everyone and everything in the place.

PARKER: Oh. Oh, shit. My sister’s in there. You got this, buddy?

SFX: Elmer the wraith raccoon chirping enthusiastically. Wraith raccoons begin chittering menacingly (and continue throughout the rest of the scene).

PARKER: Good! See you on the other side.

SFX: Parker runs toward the door. The screendoor creaks as she goes inside.

MYRTLE: Who… was she talking to?

NICK: I don’t care. Let’s get the heck out of there.

DANNY: Hey! Ow! Dangit! Ow! What the heck?!!!

MYRTLE: (scared) Something pulled the recorder right out of my hands.

NICK: Ya’ll are just letting your imaginations get carried aw––oooowwww! Something bit me!

SFX: Wraith raccoon makes angry sound.

CAS: Get in the car before anything YEOOOOOOOOWWWWWW

MYRTLE: It took my backpack!

SFX: Plastic crunching and glass shattering.

DANNY: That was my camera.

SFX: Bag rustling and shotgun pumping.  

NICK: Ready to blow whatever the heck this is away on your say so, boss.

CAS: We can’t even see what’s attacking us. And it’s broad daylight, put that thing away! Let’s cut our losses and get the heck outta here. 

SFX: Ghost hunters running. Car doors slamming. Car starting up and screeching away…


SFX: Screen door slamming shut behind Parker. Poltergeist roar in background throughout scene.

PARKER: Eulalie! Where are you? We need to get out of here!

ALICIA: (yelps) Oh, it’s you. That ghost has gone full poltergeist––

PARKER: ––and we need to get out of here. I know. Where’s Eulalie?

SFX: House rumbling ominously; josie poofs into being next to them…

ALICIA: I’m guessing the way this ghost is pointing.

PARKER: Holy shit, there really are ghosts.

JOSIE: I don’t have time to dignify that with a full response. Frankie’s gone––

ALICIA AND PARKER: Poltergeist. We know. 

JOSIE: And Eulalie won’t leave. It’s getting bad.

PARKER: Why did I have a feeling I was going to have to drag her out of here kicking and screaming? Lead the way, ghost I can suddenly inexplicably see. 

JOSIE: The name’s Josie. And it’s this way…

SFX: Footsteps leading toward the poltergeist noise.

JOSIE: (shouting over the roar) Mary? Lota? I brought backup!

PARKER: (shouting over the roar) Eulalie? We need to leave, now. 

SFX: Parker running toward Eulalie.

PARKER: Hey! Get away from my sister!

JOSIE: (shouting over the roar) Parker, wait! That’s not Frankie. 

MARY: (shouting over the roar) She passed out. We’ve been trying to keep the apartment at bay.

LOTA: (shouting over the roar) It wants her. We need to leave. Grab her arms.

ALICIA: Her pulse is weak. We need to get her back to the hospital.

EULALIE: What about Frankie? We can’t just give up on her.

MARY: She’s bonded with the house. We can come back later––when the apartment’s energies have settled again––to check in on her. But right now, the only thing we can do is leave. 

EULALIE: It’s not right. She was trying to change, and now she’s stuck. Again.

SFX: Alicia, Parker, and Eulalie’s footsteps as the group leaves the house. Lota’s power wheelchair motor whirs alongside them. The screen door opens and closes. The poltergeist roar cuts off and the sound of rain fades in.

ALICIA: If she really was trying to change, then the last thing she’ll want is for you to die after all. Besides, you don’t have to be here to talk to her. I have a Ouija board in my locker. I can teach you to use it while you’re recuperating.

SFX: Car doors opening.

LOTA: Wait.

JOSIE: What is it?

EULALIE: Is there something else we can do?

LOTA: One of the humans needs to grab that phonograph. I don’t know if there’s a way to save her…

MARY: …but if she’s connected to it, it’s important. And the house might consider it a threat.

EULALIE: Alicia, Parker, I need one of you to go get the phonograph. Please.

PARKER: The thing that started all this trouble? I say we leave it to crumble into rust.

ALICIA: I’ll be right back.

SFX: Alicia jogs back toward the house. Screen door opens and closes.


SFX: Quiet poltergeist sounds. Phonograph crackling faintly…

FRANKIE: She’s alive. (shuddering relieved breath) She’s alive and my friends stopped the exorcism. (PAUSE) Which means I signed my eternity away for nothing.

APARTMENT: (whispers, bouncing and refracting with Frankie’s voice added) nothing

FRANKIE: Is there any chance you’d reconsider our little deal? Let me leave?

APARTMENT: (whispers, bouncing and refracting with Frankie’s voice added) no. stay. signed.

FRANKIE: (enraged) You tricked me. You took advantage of my fear and you trapped me.

SFX: Frankie rips up the lease. 

APARTMENT: (whispers, bouncing and refracting with Frankie’s voice added) you. Chose.

SFX: The undamaged lease flutters back into Frankie’s hands. She cries.


SFX: Hospital monitors beeping…

PARKER: There. Now, you’re all tucked in and I expect you to stay here until your doctors––your other doctors, no offense––tell you that you can leave.

EULALIE: I think I can promise to do that.

PARKER: No matter what the ghosts say?

EULALIE: What ghosts? They’ve all gone… wherever ghosts go when they aren’t mounting rescue missions.

ALICIA: Home. They’ve gone home. 

EULALIE: Do you think we’ll ever see them again?

ALICIA: You will if they need your help with Frankie. Otherwise, probably not. 

EULALIE: Oh. (PAUSE) It was kind of nice.

PARKER: You’ve been too isolated. But don’t worry. I’m here. And I’ll be here as long as you need. Although I was kind of hoping I could crash at your place.

SFX: Parker, Alicia, and Eulalie laugh (Eulalie hysterically) until Eulalie starts to cry…

ALICIA: Hey. It’s going to be okay. Trust me, I’m a doctor.

SFX: Eulalie laugh sobs.


SFX: Traffic quiet in the background. Car radio plays end of “Halloween Again” by The Zombie Dandies.

JON HARKER: And closing out the hour, here on KBOU we have “Dead from the Beginning, Alive till the End” by Doctor Turtle. I’m Jon Harker, and it’s time for me to return to the land of the living. Until next time, ghouls…

SFX: Alicia shuts off the car and opens the door. She walks around to the back of the car and opens the trunk. She huffs as she lifts the phonograph. Then, she walks to the door. Traffic louder in the background. She knocks.   

ALICIA: (calling out) Hello? Special cursed object delivery.

SFX: A whoosh as Mary appears.

MARY: We prefer the term “betaken.” “Cursed” has such humanist connotations. Which I’m surprised you don’t know, given how many arcane things you do seem to know about.

ALICIA: Noted. And I apologize. But, um, is there someplace I can set this betaken thing down? It’s a bit heavy?

SFX: Mary opens the door. 

MARY: Follow me.

SFX: Door closes, traffic sounds end. footsteps, phonograph is set down on a table.

MARY: Thank you for dropping it off. 

ALICIA: Of course.

SFX: Footsteps resume as Alicia walks back toward the door; door opens, traffic sounds resume.

MARY: Is there something else?

ALICIA: It’s just … you haven’t heard the last of those ghost hunters.

MARY: We assumed as much. My housemates are tying up loose ends as we speak.

ALICIA: Good. (PAUSE) But… It’s just… I know one of them. And she’ll go to great lengths to finish what she started.

MARY: You know one of them?

ALICIA: It’s a long story. We aren’t close…anymore. Just…if you really want to help Frankie, you might want to rethink your priorities. Nobody’s ever unbound a poltergeist. It’s a wild goose chase at best.

MARY: (annoyed) Thank you for your warning, doctor. But I believe we’ve got it from here. Your time might be better spent keeping Eulalie firmly in the land of the living, now that she’s opened that Pandora’s box. 

SFX: Door slams shut.


SFX: Traffic sounds fade…


SFX: Phonograph starts playing…

FRANKIE: Remember me. remember. me. remember. me. 

SFX: Silence except for the click of the phonograph.

FRANKIE: (real voice breaks through) Help me.

SFX: Scary sound.


SFX: Theme music (simple guitar with spectral oohs and ohs and occasional cymbal crashes) fades in

COURTNEY: (V.O.) This episode of The Way We Haunt Now is written, directed, and produced by Courtney Floyd with voice acting (in order of appearance) by:


VARIOUS: Kirsty Woolven, Natalie Hunter, Megan Gwen Davis,  Dan Gold, Stephanie, Jeff Goldman Ali Hylton, Paul as the Apartment

KIRA: Kira Apple as Mary Bangs

COURTNEY: Courtney Floyd as Eulalie

BECCA: Becca Marcus as Lota

GEORGIA: Georgia Mckenzie as Josie

TAL: Tal Minear as Myrtle

BRAD: Brad Colbroock as Cas Bromley

LINDSAY: Lindsay Zana as Danny

PAUL: Paul H. Rollins as Nick

JESSICA: Jessica Winston as Alicia

MARNIE: Marnie Warner as Parker

TIM: Tim Lowe as Jon Harker

SFX: Theme music fades out. 

COURTNEY: Whether you’re new to the spirit world or simply a ghost in need of some entertainment, you can visit for more episodes as well as information about our cast and crew, content warnings, transcripts, and links to our social media. 

SFX: You Haint Seen Nothin’ Yet theme begins…

COURTNEY: Hello there spirits, it’s Courtney – writer, creator, and voice of Eulalie. I am manifesting at the end of this episode, our season one finale, to say thank you. First, to my cast, who did so much to bring this story to life in a year that was trying, to say the very least. And second, to all of you, for listening, and showing your enthusiasm and excitement. Because  hauntings don’t happen in vacuums, they’re a kind of connection.

Starting in the new year, we will be hard at work scripting seasons two and three. We’ve got some very exciting stuff in the works, and once we have a script we’ll be putting together a crowdfunding campaign to make sure that all of your favorite ghosts and ghost hunters get paid what they deserve to make this story come to life. Or afterlife? Either way,  keep an eye on our RSS feed for that announcement.  And in the meantime…

SFX: You Haint Seen Nothin’ Yet theme fades…

COURTNEY: Remember to haunt responsibly!

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